absolutelyBangkok archive · Being farang
Originally published Feb. 25, 2009
Thailand never fails to amaze even during the sunniest of times. A uniquely Thai thing remains how farangs commit suicide in the kingdom. Take the Italian who recently succeeded in jumping from a bridge — supposedly with a rope around his neck — while the laws of physics separated his body from the head and the head remained nicely kept in a plastic bag, hanging high over the Chao Phraya for hours.
Probably suicide,” we’re warned. And which nation wants to surpass Thailand’s astonishing rate of foreign jumpers — jumpers from Thai balconies that is. Over the years in Thailand I read of if not hundreds of farang fellas who chose to end their lives by taking a step too far. Jumping from a balcony isn’t a common way of committing suicide in the West — but not only this statistic makes you think:
One of the strangest suicides I came across was a Swiss-Italian resident of Bangkok who was found expired in his bed with his arms and legs tied behind his back — and a plastic bag over his head. Death by suffocation, was the verdict of Bangkok’s mighty in brown. Indeed the world just lost a uniquely talented artist who was able to tie up his arms and legs while putting a bag over his head. “By rocking his body,” was the official word.
Some suiciders have their credit cards and belongings taken away before — or after? — jumping, while others are lucky enough to cheat death. Some years ago some “nipple cream” was all the rage in Bangkok. Punters were knocked out while enjoying their consolation prizes and woke up hours later with a drifting mind not remembering what happened. May have been potential building-jumpers.
Not that I’m accusing any working girl of getting what is legally hers — or slightly more of it. But quite some healthy farangs die in the act and nobody really knows why that many Western and also Asian tourists and residents end seemingly trouble-free lives prematurely by jumping off high buildings or turning physical laws upside down.
Naked farang building-jumpers are such a common species already in mainly Pattaya and Bangkok that a few words will have to suffice in the paper for a mention. Others would say that many foreigners perish under suspicious circumstances in Thailand, with foul play being instantly ruled out. But hey, I’m not saying. I’m just saying.
To play it safe: Living in a high-floor condo in Thailand and having a relationship may not be conducive to one’s longevity.
And mind bridges and anything that tastes strange or feels bizarre…
Talking about paranoia and the Italian and his hanging head, there’s already a copycat looming — wish him luck:
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